Help, need relationship/life advice... I'm staying at home for the time being to help out my family instead of jetting off to another city to be with my boyfriend. Target move date is in January but we're both getting insanely antsy and we have the same conversation every day about me just going there NAO. My question is about what I should do, cause I really have no idea. Stupid details follow.



I want to move to a different city ($300 away) to be with my boyfriend (both in the US).



I'm 24 and have been living at home this whole time, except for 4 of college years I was 1 1/2 hours away and came home a lot. I want to leave the nest now. The reason I haven't moved yet is because:



1. I'm waiting on a mythical yet substantial Christmas bonus. I say mythical because this is my first Christmas at this job so I have no way of knowing how much I'll get, but it might be somewhere around $1500. That money would be very useful. If I can make it that long.



2. In these tough economic times, steady job, health insurance, blah blah blah. It's a pretty good, decently paying job but my boss is a nightmare and I'm not getting a reference letter. Plus I have NO sick days or vacation days so visits are rare. I see a bunch of jobs on Craigslist every day that I could apply for in my target city (admin/office/receptionist etc), so I feel confident I could get another one.

2a. I have about $3,000 in savings and not that many expenses/very little debt.



3. Living with my dad and brother because dad can't handle the mortgage/other debt even when he was working, and now he's not. We don't want dad to lose the house.



4. Brother feels resentful that I'm about to move because he's older and has been wanting to move for longer/missing out on opportunities and SOMEBODY has to deal with dad. Dad is a terrible alcoholic (but fine the other 10 months of the year).



5. Mom (who also moved out to be with her boyfriend at the disapproval of dad and brother) is supportive but says I need to give everyone time to figure out a plan instead of making brash decisions. They have yet to make a plan and probably won't.



6. My plan is to continue paying the very high rent I'm paying now for the (nice but not up to code) basement apartment, on top of what I wind up needing to pay after I move (which wouldn't be much as long as I'm with boyfriend). Everyone says this plan sucks. I agree it's not a long term solution but that's all I've got, short of saying "So long, suckas!" and not caring about what happens to them after that (I do care). If I keep paying then I won't need to move all my stuff and it'll keep the space open for me in case of emergency. I'm also going to have to leave my cat behind for the time being, who dad and brother aren't fond of, so I kind of feel like I'm paying his keep too.



7. Relationship with boyfriend is very good. We want more out of life than lots of phone calls and draining my savings for plane tickets.



I'm really not sure what I'm supposed to do here. If i didn't have an obligation to my family I would have been there long ago. I feel so impatient. What should I do?

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